**I am writing this while I am on the flight to Guatemala. I wrote it to give my friends and family some insight to feelings and emotions I go through leading up to a trip. It also serves to help my sort through my own feelings as my anxiety builds to reach my destination. Also, please note that I very rarely read back through what I wrote. Due to this I ask that you please forgive the many typos you will come across in this blog.
Every year I go through some of the same feelings leading up to travel:
Excitement, Stress, Excitement, Doubt, Sadness, Fear, Happiness, and Confidence
Step 1 Excitement - I always get an initial excitement that takes over my entire life once I decide on a travel destination. I am not talking about the feeling of pressing that book button on the computer but rather the beginning moment when you realize the specific destination of where you want to plan your trip.
Each year a different area of the world seemed to reach out and call name. As corny as that sounds I truly mean it. For years I had no desire to go to Africa and then one day I woke up and had a uncontrollable burning desire to go. This year that calling was Central America. A series of factors contributed to my decision including honeymoon spots Tyler would like to visit, meeting my mom and sister, and of course I would be lying if the constant mention of these countries on the news didn't heighten my desire. I tend to find myself constantly gravitating towards locations that are slammed on the news to get a better perspective.
Step 2 Stress - Next comes the stress! After being excited and scoping it all out comes the task of fitting it all together. In previous years this was less of a step as I only needed to book the flight and go with the flow once I landed. Little to no planning. However, the sections my mom and I travel on are a bit more planned out. This year that includes a portion with Tyler as well. Figuring out the perfect flights, matching up dates, making a list of things to do is all a bit of a stressful science I've come to learn.
Step 3 Excitement - Once I am booked I am back to the full throttle happy mode! Except if your name is Libby you tend to put off booking some of the flights until a week before. The it is a mix of two for months leading up. Excited about all that is booked and slightly stressed about that flight you know you need to book but never do.
Step 4 Doubt - Traveling is something I am beyond passionate about. Seeing each country in real life has given me a different perspective on each of those countries. I find that so many people filter in information from the news and allow it to create a reality that does not exist. And I do not blame people for thinking that way. If I never had the experiences that I am fortunate to have I would probably feel the same. I still sometimes do!
Year after year there are many people who comment how where I am going is unsafe. How I am going to die. They tell me racial slurs about the people of the country. Negatives upon negatives. Why would I leave the US? Are you crazy? Why would you go there it is all trash. You are going to get shot, kidnapped, bombed. You name it someone has said it to me most likely.
These perceptions are instilled in our heads by the media.
If you have never gone backpacking or travelled to many countries then chances are it's a bit harder to understand. Its hard to explain that everything we see on the news is not the entire reality.
Do these negative things happen all over the world? Yes. Do tourists sometimes die while traveling? Yes. Are places in poverty? Yes. Crime? Yes. But these things go on every single day in the United States and in our own cities. In actuality they happen much less to tourists visiting other countries than when living in their own city.
The best way it was ever described to me was by a lovely girl in Santorini, Greece. She had told us all about a trip she had booked to the United States but had decided to cancel it due to all of the shootings. Here I was listening to someone say they were too scared to travel to the United States due to news coverage. Truthful I feel extremely safe in my daily life and to hear someone would be too scared to visit my country made me sad. But in reality it makes perfect sense. And if I sit down and think only of the negative, of the news reports, and forget about the fact that every day life goes on and on all over the world it is easy to get caught up in the fear.
I try to tell people that and explain it. Some people get it and some don't. That's ok!
However, in the end the constant remarks do eventually spur a little doubt in my head.
Step 5 Sadness- Leaving home is exciting but it is always a bit sad. As the doubt begins to flicker it sparks the sadness that I get knowing I am leaving my friends, family, and now husband. Recently getting married make it just that much harder. Luckily I have been able to combat that feeling a bit knowing I will get to be on my honeymoon with Tyler for over two weeks of travel this year!
Step 6 Fear- I would be lying if total fear does not set in right before leaving. All of a sudden all the negatives people said seem like a possibility. All the excitement is gone. Every plane is going to crash. Terrified to step off the plane alone and find a taxi. Every taxi driver is a sex trafficker. How will I make friends? Head spinning this is how I leave for a trip. So why go? Because I know I have to. I have to push self and continue to grow and learn about the world. Fear is temporary and I must overcome that to get to the goal.
Step 7/8 Happiness/Confidence- I haven't reached that point yet since I am currently on the flight but I know the feeling. It will happen within my 24 hours of reaching my first destination. The happiness of travel will take over and my confidence in how I travel will return. The familiar feel of meeting people in hostel, confidence as I negotiate Tuk Tuk prices, and the dirt and grim of living out of a back pack will return. In that moment I will smile as I know I am back home on the road.
Please do not mistake my views on world travel for ignorant bliss. I'm fully aware there are dangers in travel. But I recognize that much of the fear we possess is unwarranted in many cases. Travel safe and aware always. But fear only the things that need it and don't waste your energy on the other false fears,
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